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Today has been a stressful day. One of many in my life, one where I find myself trying not to think...
2013. szeptember 18., szerda 00:11Today has been a stressful day. One of many in my life, one where I find myself trying not to think about the complexity of everything and just wanting to escape. I cycled ~16km, it felt good, it cleared my head and I no longer felt overwhelmed. A hot shower, a banana and a cup of Sencha Sakura - before slipping into bed and I am finally calm. I am reminded that even if I felt unhappy today, my life is good.
Tonight I really just wanted to talk, to get some of the countless thoughts that run through my mind out there. I had forgotten about this website, I must have registered it a long time ago - but a tumblr related work inquiry, combined with the recent retirement of my old blog lead me here. Always interesting to me when something serendipitous like that happens.
I have always liked the idea of a clean slate, a fresh start. Sometimes I wonder if that was one of the main reasons I was so keen to go to University, half a country away from my friends and family. As much as I enjoy a new beginning, I have a nasty habit of generating aspirations that are too high, when I am presented with one. I will get a new notebook and decide that this will be the one that I write something to change the world in. I am foolish to think that.
Sure, for some areas of my life setting virtually impossible goals is a good thing, at least in terms of generating results - but nearly always in the form of falling short, yet still getting a lot done. I am fed up with failing though and when given a fresh start - I am in control about how possible and likely failure is. This blog, whatever comes of it, is not a place for lofty goals. I want it to purely be a place to think out loud, regardless of who (if anyone) listens.
This is unfamiliar territory for me, not having a strict set of rules or guidelines. No schedule or agenda to stick to, no objective or purpose. I am equally excited and afraid about the idea of having no boundaries or constraints. I do not know how often I will write here, what I will talk about - nor do I want to. What will be, will be.
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